Faith & Power to Restore

Today I’d like to share a quote. It’s a quote by General Patton from years ago and it says “If a man takes it upon himself God’s right to punish, then a man must also take upon himself, God’s promise to restore”.

I know April is Second Chance month. I don’t know how many people out there know that or how many are living their lives trying to get a second chance or how many like me, who are incarcerated, think it’s only us that need one. I know there are people everywhere that are praying for a “do-over” in life, if you put it that way. There are many avenues out there to restart your life steps but sometimes in here, I feel like I’m helpless here at times. I’ve taken steps for over 40 years to re-boot, rehabilitate, redeem, restore my life for a second chance.

Of course, we know there are a lot of words that start with ‘re’. Restore stands out in that quote that I shared earlier and that’s the one I’d like to talk about today because to me that means to repair, to reestablish, to reinstate, to rebuild, to restructure, to recreate to reform. I feel like I’ve worked hard to do these things; mentally, emotionally, spiritually. A lot of things I did were educational steps so I could improve my intellect and my decision making by gaining a lot of knowledge. I think I’ve obtained most of my restoration from my mind and my heart and my soul, but to be on a redeemed path so I could help others, the ones especially who get their second chance and leave here. I like to help them be on a better path and to do better and be better for other people, once they’re back with their families and in their communities.

It’s never seemed like what I’ve done here has ever been enough. I know I can’t give myself a second chance to be with my family right now. I can atone for the loss that was caused by my mistakes that I made when I was 21. For years I was at the mercy of a Kentucky Parole Board. I spent those years doing all that I could do to earn that privilege of parole-100+ programs, 7 degrees, 1 disciplinary in decades, volunteering, preaching, nothing seemed to matter to them…their decision. You sometimes need to reward people. They didn’t do these things. People, they gave second chances to have recommitted, returned, and re-harmed society even.

Now I don’t mean to share this out of envy or any kind of disrespect. I say it because I want people, out there and the ones who do have a second chance that are incarcerated to take it serious and don’t take it for granted. My second chance seemed to rest in the hands of politically appointed people on a parole board. There are other people who try to give me hope in Kentucky. I’ve read a 14-page opinion by the Supreme Court Justice, her name is Justice Michelle Keller. She talks about serve-outs with life sentences because there’s a lot of gravity and interest placed on the state when you do this. The parole board seems to be given the power that’s inconsistent with the Kentucky Constitution she even said. My serve-out is not really just death by incarceration for me, which I wasn’t sentenced to in the first place. But you have to think about it this way, that it’s a life altering decision for my family, my friends and my community. They tell me they need restored love out there to help pay it forward and help our young people.

It seems like many parole boards across our great nation have given themselves a blank check to deny release, and that’s based on one factor, and that’s the seriousness of the crime. They also only seem to use it when they want to, not in every case. I now have the same sentence, death by incarceration as mass murderers, serial killers, other people and I never try to negate my part. Yet I advocate this is cruel for those who didn’t commit the crime** and most states are finding that and making re-sentencing laws that if you didn’t commit that crime**, you’re not eligible for that type of sentence. I’m just asking for many states to recognize, I’m asking governors to recognize. I’m not asking for a pardon, not many of us do. Yet Governor Beshear of Kentucky, he has the pen to commute my sentence, and I hope that one day he will.

** “didn’t commit the crime” is referring to her charge of (complicity) to murder, which is being present at a murder but not the one who committed the act of murder. This is also known as “felony murder” in many states.